The Proposal

I love our proposal story and I wanted to share it with everyone! 

This past Friday ended like a typical night would. I went to bed setting my alarm for work the next day. Except that wasn’t what happened… I was woken up by my dad yelling good morning and for me to wake up. What?! No. It wasn’t even time for me to wake up! Anyone who knows me knows I love my beauty sleep. My dad handed me a card and continued to tell me to wake up. 

At this point I wasn’t suspecting anything because I kept complaining to John that he worked all week and hadn’t spent much time with me. Little did I know…

So my mom and I got ready and went to the nail salon. I picked out one of my favorite fall colors and enjoyed every minute spent with my mom. Next thing I know, I look up and see his sister-in-law with a camera. I think the look on my face showed how shocked I was to see her! She then handed me the second card from John and we proceeded to the next stop! I pretty much guessed after reading this where we were headed. 

At this point I knew something was up. I work all the time and never like calling out. So I started to wonder if this was really happening. The entire drive to our next stop I’m sitting there excited and probably quiet (unusual for me) because I’m trying to piece this all together. 

But here we are, at my Nana and Pop’s house! They gave me the third card and Nana was now along for the ride! 

*this one made me tear up a little* 

So, the next stop I immediately knew where we were headed. I couldn’t figure out why though. I started to get worried because John knows I hate watching a movie unless it’s something really good. So I had no clue why we would make a stop at the movies! 

Then I’m a little relieved after reading this. We weren’t going there to watch a movie, we were there to pick up his Mawmaw and head to our next stop. 

On the Border! I love that place. When we arrived his mom, sister, and niece were there to join us for lunch. I was given another card! 

I was sooo happy! I got to share lunch with women who all hold dear to my heart. 

After we were finished with lunch, his sister-in-law FaceTimed me. I was happy that she was included in on this special day. She lives in another state so I don’t get to talk to her very often. 

She shared scripture with me and then told me details about what the night holds. 

We went to my house to get ready and my dad gave me the final card of the day. 

And we were off! I had no clue where… but I was excited!! We arrived at John’s house and my dad said he needed to go inside with me to talk to John for a second. I didn’t really think much of it until I started walking up the sidewalk. Then I knew something was about to happen…  like soon! 

I was blown away at how much effort he had put into this entire proposal. It was unreal to me and I was in complete shock. 

So, I walked to the end and began to look at all of the pictures of us from different stages in our relationship. John then meets me at the end and asks the big question!

Of course I say yes!!

This wasn’t the end though! Right after the question, both of our families come out to join us for a quick celebration and prayer!! I had no idea they were there. 

This was by far one of the best days of my life! I’m excited to start this journey with John by my side. 

It has been a while…

For the people who read my (really) rough draft, I am sorry. I totally didn’t mean to publish it and realized I did a day later (my life, ugh). I haven’t posted or shared anything on my blog site in a while. I really don’t have an excuse as to why I’ve disappeared. I really enjoy blogging, I just haven’t made time for it. 

Since it has been a while, I figure I will catch you up. Work has been extremely busy. It is finally settling down where I can actually breathe and think. My boyfriend is still deployed, but we are at the half way mark. I’ll be graduating in a month with my business degree (I can’t believe that day is almost here!). 

With all that being said, I am just exhausted. It’s hard being in retail management. I work crazy hours and don’t get to spend time with my family or friends often because the hours I work vary. John is gone, so it makes it hard for us to communicate. Where he is at currenty makes his schedule clash with mine. 

This post is to catch people up with where I’m at in life, but more importantly, I hope that someone who can relate is reading this. That was the main purpose of my post. I never intended to date a guy in the military. I wasn’t searching for that. You can’t help who you fall in love with. I think that makes it harder on me during this time. I never thought I would be one of those girls who wait at home while their man is gone for months at a time. Not that anything is wrong with that, obviously because I’m one of them now, but it was not my “plan”. I’ve learned a lot about life since having that perception. It takes a strong and independent woman to go through this. I have learned a lot about myself already (part of it being I’m not as strong and independent as I thought I was). 

I’m learning to cope with deployment. It’s weird, mainly because I feel like my life is how it was before I met John. When I think about him coming home it feels weird. Weird to be a couple again. Like I said, I never thought I would be this girl, but I am. If you’re someone who is about to go through this same thing… Be ready, be strong, and be patient. 

On the flip side of my depressing moment, I am so happy. I have a man who works hard at what he does. He’s accomplished a lot more than other guys his age. He is my rock. He works so hard at making sure I am okay while he’s gone. When I say it’s weird with him being gone I say that because he’s my best friend. I miss doing crazy random things with him. Everything reminds me of him. Lucky for me, he will be home at the end of July. Not much longer! I know others go through a longer deployment than that. This post isn’t a pity party on me, it’s just a post catching everyone up on my life. It’s probably too much honesty in one post, but hey, that’s just how I am. 

I know I have some fellow Milsos following me, so if you can relate or will be in this position soon, comment below or email me. I love to talk to fellow Milsos. Honestly, it makes this process much easier to have someone to talk with. 

Sorry again for the draft being posted! 

-Alayna

   

The sin of Comparison

Who else is familiar with the crappy feeling of comparison? You are not alone. Many people struggle with this sin of comparison, and yes, comparison is sin. Comparison comes natural to many of us, but doesn’t sin? 

Comparison is something that will kill, steal, and destroy (just as the Bible speaks of the thief doing the same in John 10:10). Comparison is the thief of joy! We see it everywhere we go. Our family and friends go out of their way just to compare themselves to others. It is unhealthy and will steal your joy! 

How do we get away from it? I can tell you from my own personal experience that it only comes from the help of God. I remember constantly comparing myself to others while I was in middle and high school. I lost my identity. Once I started living in the “real world” I regretted ever comparing myself to others. Thing things I would’ve done or wouldn’t have done if I had my identity in Christ instead of in the opinion of others. 

Since high school, I rarely ever compare myself to others. I have really tried to stay true to who I am and my identity in Christ. Of course, I find myself wishing I had the “car she drives” or the “clothes she wears”, but then I realize how materialistic I am becoming. Luckily I have an amazing boyfriend who keeps me in check as well 😉. He’s a keeper (but I’ll go on about that in an upcoming blog). 

I can only tell you from my personal experience, but I am extremely happy with who I am in Christ. I’m constantly growing and maturing. Having your identity in something higher than this world will give you the ultimate confidence. You will begin to find joy in every circumstance, which is such a great feeling! 

  

Side note: I appreciate all the likes and comments from other bloggers. I love reading about other peoples perspectives. If you have any questions or comments, you know what to do. 
Love you all,

Alayna. 

Dating with distance

Just ready for today to be over.
I’m missing my man more than anything right now and it is a horrible feeling honestly. I’m thankful for all the United States Air Force has done for my boyfriend and all the opportunities given. That doesn’t make deployment any easier though. We are only a month into it and I know it’s not even a third of the way. I try not to complain about it, or even act as if the distance bothers me, because it is what it is.

People tell me “oh, honey it only gets easier” or “he will be home soon, time flies by”. I know their intentions are good, but any military girfriend/wife can relate when I say those are empty words. Imagine going a month without something you love. You would miss it, and depending on what it is, you would probably want it back. That’s me, all of the time. The feeling of the unknown literally makes me depressed.

Although, I have learned that the best way not to miss something is to keep yourself busy. No matter what, something or someone will remind you of them. But hopefully it will be a sweet thought and you can continue to go about your day. It’s hard but I find when I miss him the absolute most (because I miss him all the time) is when I’m not busy.

The point of the post was not to throw a pity party, but to let other military girlfriends/wives know that they are not alone. If someone tells you it gets easier as time goes on, then they lied… Or they just don’t love their man as much as we do!

I’m always here if anyone needs to talk, I can relate. ❤️

– Alayna

Be young. No one expects you to have it all together.

Work all day, study all night, go to bed and stay up worrying about the next day.

Hey, at least that’s what I do.

I know I am not the only college student that thinks they are supposed to have it all together. We grew up with this constant pressure from society to do something big. We are told to get involved in as many extracurricular activities, not because we genuinely enjoy them, but so it will look appealing on our college application(s). Some of us go to a university, others of us attend a community college, and some of us either choose a different path or simply cannot afford college. We are all in this constant battle to compete, compare, and make proud when we have truly lost focus. I say that because I am speaking about myself, and I know it applies to others as well.  No matter what path we have decided, we ALL think we should have it together by now.

I am here to tell you that it is okay. You do not have to have your life all “figured out”. Heck, I don’t even know what “figured out” is supposed to mean. We are young and we need to learn to enjoy life at this stage. Sometimes we need those 12am pizza rolls while watching Netflix, when we know we should be studying. Or we need to go to the mall with friends and spend $50 on expensive makeup… Okay not really because we know that money can go to something more useful like more pizza rolls. You get the point.

Anyways, I am writing you, the hardworking college student, to tell you to be happy and enjoy life! Soon we will be reminiscing the “good ole college days” and probably laugh at all the stress we caused ourselves. So while you are out there figuring out your life, remember to enjoy this stage!

 

Confession Time

So, I have a confession to make… I am a perfectionist, I have high expectations, and I am the hardest on myself. With that being said, I have a HARD time being content. You too, may have this very same struggle.

1) I am very independent. I believe in doing things myself and making sure they are done correctly.

2) When my goals are not met, I am sure to beat myself up for it.

3) If I am not where I thought I should be at a certain point in my life I begin to question everything.

If you relate to any of those above, you are not alone. Something that has been laying heavily on my heart recently is how to be content. Since graduating high school I have accomplished a lot. I have worked fulltime in management (which has helped me purchase my OWN car) and I have (almost) graduated with a business degree.

I said that to say, I feel like a failure at times. My dream is to be a young business owner. The older I get the more upset I am because it seems as if I am not any closer to my goal. The other day my mom reminded me “honey, you are only 21”. It hit me. I am only 21. I need to chill out. God has blessed me tremendously with many opportunities. Though I do not understand it at times, I should trust His plan.

It is not human nature to be content. Some may find it easier than others. Unfortunately for me, I have to ask for strength to be content. I have realized to thank God for all that He has given me.

“I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity.
I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:10, 12-13‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Many people take these verses out of context and use them as empowerment to be a”super-Christian”. Actually, Paul is saying not that God will give him the strength to do anything he wants, but through anything that God allows, God will give him the strength he needs. Paul displayed this strength from Jesus in his life with his ability to be content.

Your life might not seem like it is coming together as you planned, and you might be hard on yourself, but trust in God’s plan. Stop struggling with contentment and thank God for the opportunities.

Goodbye 2015

Time flies when you’re having fun… Or when you’re getting older. For me, I believe it is a mix of the both.

I have enjoyed the past year. I was able to spend another year with my loving family and boyfriend, I have grown as an individual, I have been blessed with many opportunities, and I have also learned to cherish every moment.

Those who are close to me know that this has been a challenging year. I have worked a full-time  (and also part-time on the side) job while going to college. To make it even more hectic, it was all during the Christmas season. That means retail crazieness, all the insane people that come out to shop during the season, AND exams (not to mention managerial accounting that made me cry everytime I completed an assignment). So, needless to say, I found my first grey hair in my head. I am praying I was being over dramatic and it was the lighting hitting the blonde just right making it appear to be grey… Even though I have brown hair lol. Either way I ripped that thing out! Nobody has time for that “getting old” stuff around here.

While 2015 was an adventure, I look forward to 2016. God has blessed me tremendously and I continue to pray for His guidance throughout my life. I graduate with a business degree this spring, my boyfriend comes home from deployment in the late summer, and I will have my car paid off soon! I trust that more opportunities will come my way. I see nothing but big things happening this year!

It has been real 2015!